Seek Woman for Cuddling and Cunnilingus

"I’m 75 years old and have had only one erection in 10 years. Yet I would love to meet women, any age, for friendship and sex. To me, sex is touching, kissing, cunnilingus, fondling, laughing, and enjoying things together. I love my wife but am not attracted to her. I would like to meet someone who wants a cuddle every now and then and likes petting and roleplaying. But I am not in good health, so I was wondering if I could start this online, maybe both of us masturbating?"

"I’m not attracted to my wife. I want to meet someone for cuddling, cunnilingus, and more."

Joan answers:

Certainly, you can find an online sex partner to masturbate with via phone or video. The simplest way, especially during this time of Covid-19, is to hire a sex worker who will provide exactly the kind of auditory or visual experience you seek. You’ll discuss your needs and desires ahead of time, and she will tell you her parameters and the fee. Transactional sex is the most straightforward way to get what you want. Then when the isolation orders are lifted, you can find a local sex worker to meet in person for the sexual interaction you want.

You can use the hook-up and dating sites to find women willing to do this, too, but it’s much more laborious to find someone who wants exactly what you do and who clicks with you personally and sexually, especially as a married man with health problems.

You say, “I love my wife but am not attracted to her”. What arrangement do you have with your wife for getting your sexual needs met outside your marriage? You didn’t ask about this part, but I urge you to talk to your wife about your needs and desires. See if you can arrive at an agreement for you to seek a sexual outlet. I don’t recommend telling your wife that you’re not attracted to her, though — that would be hurtful without any beneficial outcome.

If you — or a reader — would like advice about how to bring up opening a relationship, please feel free to submit another question on this topic.