“Guaranteed satisfaction every time!” Or so the articles claim. Learn about her neglected erogenous zone. Discover the mysterious secret of women’s pleasure. Drive her wild with this one weird trick.
And they’re right. There really is one thing, that anyone can learn to do, which will make sure she’s smiling and satisfied – or asking for more, which arguably is even better. Are you ready?
Listen.
That’s it. Honestly, it really is that simple. Of course, before you can manage it, you need to get over the idea that there is a magic solution which will work on every woman, every time. This might not be easy, but it isn’t complicated.
You might have been expecting an anatomy lesson, and there are a few details coming up. Perhaps you wanted an instruction list with diagrams, like something you’d get from IKEA. Maybe you thought this would be a paragraph full of promises and a hard sell for a new toy . . . okay, we’ll own up to that one. But honestly, all of that is background to the important part: you’re going to need to listen. Properly. Every time. So let’s set the scene with some uncomfortable facts.
On average, women score sex with men as less satisfying than encounters with women or going solo.

Invite your partner to use her favourite toy during sex.
When a man and a woman have sex, he’s much more likely to climax than she is. This is called the orgasm gap and is probably connected to the fact that very few women can come by penetration alone. None of this is your fault, and the good news is we can do better.
Giving up preconceptions will help. Real espionage doesn’t look like a Bond movie, and good sex doesn’t look like most porn. (Remember that most pornography is made by men, for men – the exceptions are worth supporting.) The details of what one woman enjoys may not do much for another, so relying on past experience is unreliable at best.
As a couple, you may enjoy diving into the library at www.omgyes.com. This video library features a plethora of different women sharing their most touching sex stories as well as explaining the unique ways in which sexual pleasure works in their bodies.
What she enjoys may change with age, mood or hormones levels, so familiar patterns may not always be the right way to go either.
So instead of assuming you know what will work, ask.
Whether the commitment is for a lifetime or an evening, you need enough trust to get some honest answers. Take your time together, making clear there’s no rush; more touching, more kissing, more talking. Ask questions.
Some answers will be in words, and sometimes you’ll need to pay attention to more subtle signals too. Ask what she needs to feel fulfilled, and if that includes an orgasm, how. And how many; men tend to come once, but for some women, that’s just the start. When you start to touch, guess at a speed then halve it; the same goes for pressure.
You can always speed up, or press harder, but it’s better to tease than leave her wincing.