How did you decide to be a male escort?
I had a few female friends who said I should give it a try. I’d often thought about it, but never got around to it until a couple of years ago when I did a search online and came across Gentlemen4Hire. They looked like a great agency, so I thought I’d give it a try.
Just prior to becoming an escort I was a personal trainer. I’ve always had an interest in fitness so the fact I keep in shape obviously helps with the escorting. I still do some personal training on the side but most of my income now comes from escorting.
How much do you charge?
I charge £80 per hour for new clients and £60 for repeat customers. I only see repeat customers that I like, so I’m happy to lower the fee a bit for them. If people want longer, then I negotiate a one-off fee, usually around £600 for a whole weekend. As you can see, it’s decent money, and most of the time I enjoy what I do, so it doesn’t really feel like working!
I do get timewasters contacting me wanting to meet for free, or for very, very little money. I just ignore them as I’ve no time to deal with people like that.
Do you have a personal grooming routine?
I wouldn’t really say it’s a ‘routine’, but I do take care to look and smell good. I obviously make sure I’m showered and all my clothes are clean. I’ll have spoken to the client beforehand to see if they have particular requirements on what to wear; if it’s for a work occasion or wedding then I’ll need to dress appropriately for that.
Some of my clients have bought me clothes, so I’ve built up quite a wardrobe over the past couple of years. I now have quite a few different outfits to cover most occasions.
What is the best way for a client to approach you?
I have an email and a mobile set up especially for existing and new clients. I never hand out my personal phone number. I always have my work phone with me, though, so I’m contactable at any time. I often get calls in the evening, seeing if I’m free within the next hour or so.
How do you market yourself given the current climate of FOSTA/SESTA?
As far as I’m aware this is only applicable to the US market, so it’s not really affecting me at the moment. If they bring something similar out in the UK then I’ll need to have a think about it, but luckily for me I’ve got quite a few repeat clients now. Also, Gentlemen4Hire doesn’t allow anyone to advertise sexual services for sale so I don’t think there would be an issue with this kind of legislation anyway.
If you have progressed to sex with your client, how do you get it up if it’s someone you’re not very physically attracted to?
Gentlemen4Hire make it clear that sex isn’t for sale. If I wanted to have sex with a client, this would be a private matter between me and the individual. However, I’ve had a few clients that I’ve met through other advertising I do and things have progressed further there. I’ve not had the issue of finding a client unattractive yet, but I guess if I did I’d probably take a Viagra and keep my eyes shut while we got it on!
Do you think the stigma towards sex work is changing?
It’s changing a bit, but there’s still a stigma. If you look at internet dating as an example, probably 10 years ago, pre-Tinder, lots of people did internet dating but no one really admitted to it. However now there’s no stigma at all and pretty much all single people use Tinder and other apps for dating.
I think it will be a similar thing with escorting. Now, people would probably only admit to using escorts to their close friends. However, over time I suspect people’s attitudes to it will relax.
I don’t really have an issue talking about my work, but there are people I wouldn’t tell, such as my parents. Most of my friends know and none of them have an issue with it – if anything most of them are jealous!
How do you think your experience in this job differs from that of female sex worker?
I think the biggest difference is safety. That’s probably the main concern for most female escorts: at the end of the day most of their bookings are with someone physically stronger than they are. As a straight male escort, I don’t really have to think about the safety side of it: my main concern is with timewasters and people changing their minds about bookings at the last minute.
Best/worst thing about becoming a male escort?
The best thing is being paid to meet different people, especially when they’re good fun. Then I’m being paid for something I’d do for free anyway. I’ve met some amazing people and learnt so much, I consider myself very lucky to have found this career.
The worst thing is the timewasters. Plenty of people call who aren’t serious and are just mucking around. A couple of times I’ve been stood up, which is very annoying!
Is demand for your service increasing and why do you think that is?
It’s definitely increased from a few years ago. I think that this kind of thing has less stigma now. I think people are more comfortable trying new things and understanding that women have the same needs as men than they used to be. I strongly believe that the demand will continue to grow. Maybe women still won’t openly admit to everyone that they use escorts, but I know that some of my clients discuss it with their friends and don’t get a negative response.
Do you tell partners what you do and how do they feel about it?
When I first decided to be a male escort I was very secretive about it and did date a couple of women that I didn’t tell. However, it’s just not possible to keep it a secret as I’m often working in the evenings and uncontactable, so partners just get suspicious.
Now if I’m dating someone, I tell them very early on. Obviously it puts some people off straight away, but others are fine with it. Really just depends how open-minded they are.
*Not his real name. Image posed by model.
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