The EDGE Blog

Mutual Masturbation Tips For Couples

Ever thought about masturbating with your partner? While at first the idea can be surprising, couples often find that partnered masturbation comes quite naturally and adds an incredible dimension of hotness and closeness in the bedroom. Guest author M. Christian gives his top tips for couples exploring mutual masturbation.

We all know that sharing is caring. But did you know it can also be hot?  As in extremely, absolutely, and wonderfully so.

I’m referring to using the joy of self-pleasuring and turning it into something special couples can do together.

Mutual Masturbation a fantastic method for partners to share what arouses them and how they like to be touched.

up close of a sexy couple holding hands in bed

Not to mention revealing how their body acts before, during, and after orgasm. A greater sexual understanding that can then be used to enrich every other aspect of their sex lives.

Typically people consider masturbation as a solitary act. Or, I’m sad to say, something to ashamed of. Which is 100% not true, a fact backed up by years of painstaking research. In fact, they recommend it for everything from insomnia to gaining awareness of your sexuality.

So before getting into Mutual Masturbation Tips For Couples, here’s a quick technique to get comfortable sharing your self-pleasuring with someone else.

It’s okay to be shy.

It’s natural to be nervous about masturbating in front of your partner. Because of this, try doing it while you’re under the covers. This way, you can share the experience yet have some privacy.

If you’re still shy, think about doing it with your partner. But perhaps with the lights off. Or, again, while you’re both snugs as bugs in a rug.

Getting used to revealing this side of your sexuality can take time. Having a supportive and enthusiastic partner can help. As can taking things as slowly as either of you need. Remember, good things come, and I mean come, to those who wait.

On your mark, get set—

After you’re both comfy and ready to play, here’s my first mutual masturbation tip:

Have a race!

Now, agreed, some people might be faster than others. If this is the case, tweak this couple’s competition by trying to orgasm together. This game is also excellent practice for when you do other sexual things together, as well.

diagram of ATOM PLUS on the bodyGet close, but not too close.

A race to see who can cross the orgasmic finish line is one thing. But how about each of getting close to that goal but then pulling back. Edging, as this is called, has all sorts of benefits. Such as helping to learn how to control and even delay orgasm. And when done enough times, the eventual orgasm often is longer-lasting and more intense!

Toys and edging go … well, maybe not hand in hand, but you get the point. For those with penises, you can’t go wrong with ATOM PLUS. This wrap-around, whole-package vibrator is a favorite for edging fans. Coupled with its delightful stimulations and ability to be put where it’ll do the most good – the perineum –  you’ll find it all sorts of fun.

Meanwhile, the Vulva-equipped should get their mitts on KURVE. Our dual-motored G-spot vibrator rocks many a sexual world. Whether it’s reaching your G-spot or tickling your clit, it’s a wonder toy for mutual masturbation sexgames.

Having Fun With Technology

Sex toys for perimenopause - PULSE DUO LUX couples' toyEdging isn’t the only game you can play with a Kurve or an Atom Plus. How about using these high text delights to have fun taking control of how they’re used.

Picture this: you’re both comfy and ready to play. But your sex toy is in the hands of your partner, who, with the push of a button, can turn you on as well.

Just imagine the games you could play.

Like seeing how fast or how slow they can make you come. Or rolling dice to see whose turn it is to be on the giving or receiving end?

The possibilities are wonderfully endless. And I’ve still got more mutual masturbation tips for couples to come!


Look into my eyes.

You don’t always need fancy-dandy sex toys to experience shared arousal. Though it can help, of course.

A low-tech technique is as long as masturbation: how gazing into each other’s eyes can be powerfully arousing. This might sound too simple to be fun but, trust me, it’s a remarkable experience.

It’s also one of the best methods to connect with another person deeply. I’ll go so far as to wager that you’ll both come fast and hard the first time to do it.

Do what I say.

As you can take or give control of toys such as ATOM, PULSE, JETT, and KURVE, you can do the same with your mouth.

No, I’m not talking about oral sex. Though that undoubtedly can be a fab addition to your mutual masturbation playtimes. Rather, I mean instructing your partner to do this, that, or whatever else you want them to do.

Naturally, you have to have clear and unequivocal consent.

Part of this is making sure you both feel emotionally physically safe. Along with setting up safewords and the like so if things get too intense, everything can stop or slow down.

After this is in place, though, let your erotic imagination fly. And, who knows, playing around with power exchange may expose a new sexual dimension to play in. One you can explore together by taking and giving control.

KURVE in hands at different anglesLet’s play together!

While arousing on its lonesome, nothing beats sharing your joy with someone you care about. There’s something genuinely magical—and erotic—in using self-pleasure to open yourself up. And from there to mutually enrich your lives, sexual or otherwise.

Though I’ve listed my ideas for mutual masturbation tips for couples, feel free to create your own games.

Imagination, after all, is like sex in its power to reveal much about ourselves and our desires.

That and communication, without which no relationship can fully bloom. Then, with the magic of imagination and safety able to express your needs, go where you both want to go.

Be it masturbating or anything else, always done with passion and empathy to grow together.

Sex tech for sex rebels can be found in its natural habitat, Hot Octopuss’ online store!

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