Our latest guest post from sex educator Jane Jett describes how she created the mix of BDSM and Neo Tantra she calls ‘Kinktra’.
My fascination with sexuality began when I was a young girl attending a strict Catholic school. Curiosity about the link between sin and sensuality was always the driving force behind my rebellious ways. So despite all religious teachings to the contrary, I wanted to immerse myself in the ocean of sexual knowledge.
I began to spend most of my days reading psychology books based on nothing but human sexuality. The more I read, the more determined I was to build my future around it. At college I studied psychology with the intention of becoming a psychologist working in the sexuality field.
Around that time I started working as an erotic model, and a close friend of mine who was a dominatrix suggested that I should look a little deeper into becoming a dominatrix myself. For me this was a no-brainer. The friend guided me to my BDSM mentor, known as Domina Angelina, who I hold great love and admiration for to this day. As Dominatrix Jane Jett I was in the Kink lifestyle for several years. I learned all the different kink modalities, learning about the mind-body connection, and developing an understanding of the psychological healing processes that can come about through these practices.
Along comes Tantra
I was still working with the elements of kink and psychology, but Neo Tantra drew me for the soul connection to sensuality and sexuality it offers. I was lucky enough to find a mentor who did not teach Tantra in the ‘traditional’ ways. My teacher Psalm Isadora was a tantric rebel eager to teach women the healing power that pleasure could bring to the body, utilising ancient healing methods that would require meditation and a deeper body connection. This is when I fully and uninhibitedly felt the calling to combine all of my greatest loves to aid the mind, body and soul connection.
How I developed Kinktra
I’ve learned that a fetish is something enchanting and bewitching, into which power is invested – and can be touched. More specifically, an erotic fetish is something that a person is aroused by and values highly, in a manner that seems like an over-investment to others.
What has Kink or BDSM to do with Tantra? And Tantra with BDSM?
Isn’t Kink about darkness, pain and abuse, where Tantra is all about light & love?
Not for me.
In my world, both Kink and Tantra are amazing teachers and ways to discover yourself in a deep, profound way – and to find ecstasy. Both are about being in the moment with all that is present. Both are about surrendering to feelings. Whether that’s the surrender to feelings of following (can I trust you?) or leading (can I trust myself?).
Kinktra’s motto is ‘pleasure is power’, allowing us to play with the polarities of leading and following (sometimes called dominating and submitting) to enable ourselves to explore sides of us that we sometimes cannot so easily access. Tantra helps us to connect with our anger, sadness and more. But have you encountered your inner bitch, slut, goddess, sadist or masochist yet? The power in powerlessness? The pleasure in summoning another? To live fully means embracing all parts of yourself fully. Including parts you might judge or even feel afraid of.
Kinktra is empowering, allowing you to explore the edges of your comfort zone in a playful way. You will learn some basics of both Tantra and BDSM and how you can imply imprints you received in daily life.