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Neuroscientists have a saying that neurons (brain cells) that fire (get active) together wire (develop more connections) together.

What that means is that the more we use our minds to make connections between pleasurable sensations and experiences, the more intense and pleasurable our erotic sensations can become.

The ability to have pleasurable sexual experiences and orgasms is a form of learning.  The more we make these connections, the stronger the pleasure pathway connections between our genitals and our brain’s pleasure centers become.

Think of it like how a muscle gets strengthened through regular exercise training. We can turn up the volume on our genital sensations — and increase our orgasmic potential — if we lay down and strengthen those pathways over and over.

This exercise offers you a way to increase your ability to access sensations in your genitals, which will then make it easier to access sexual pleasure. Based on my research, I created this exercise after studying the difference between imagined touch and actual physical touch of the genitals.

What I found from my study was that just thinking about pleasurable sexual stimulation without any touch at all, could light up the brain’s pleasure centers like a Christmas tree — very much like what orgasms do to the brain!


Find a comfortable place where you’re not going to be disturbed. Wear comfortable clothes that allow an all-access pass to your private parts. Put on some nice music and perhaps light a candle. Remember this is time to simply experience your sensations — the intention is not to orgasm.

Begin by rhythmically tapping and stroking your clitoris (if you prefer, you can simply touch any area of your genitals, including using your fingers to explore your vagina).

Concentrate on how your fingers feel as they experience the sensations of touch as you touch yourself — and then widen your sensory awareness to also include how your clitoris/genitals feel receiving the touch.

As you rhythmically tap or stroke your genitals, simply register the good or pleasant feelings; this is not intended to be erotic.

After about five minutes of tapping, rest a minute or two, and notice any sensations that linger post-touch. We tend to not pay keen attention to the full range of our sensations — how they register or ramp up or ramp down. Tuning in to the subtlest of sensations as they build up or release is a good practice to tune into our ability to register sensations.

Now, it’s time to tune into your imagination. For the next minute or two just think about touching your genitals in the same exact way you just did in the first part of the exercise. Tune into the experience — and don’t worry if you don’t seem to actually “feel” sensations from the genitals by just thinking about them. Focus on the imagined experience.

Continue by interspersing rounds of actual touch stimulation with rounds of imagined stimulation and simply pay attention to all of your sensations. The key here is repetition. The more you go back and forth between rounds of touch and rounds of imagined touch, the more you will prime the power of imagination to access sensations.

Again, this exercise is not meant to lead to an orgasm here or even turn you on. It’s designed to teach you how to focus on experiencing sensations from the body both from touching and then imagining touch.

You can also do the same with your nipples (whether you are a man or woman), as my research has shown that the nipples also pave a pathway to the place where genital sensations land! You can also practice touching any part of your body (lips, neck, inner thighs, etc.) that you might experience as pleasurable and sensual.

Relax and enjoy. Remember pleasure is not a luxury. It’s a necessity for wellbeing.


For extra fun you can combine this exercise by alternating between focusing on the actual KURVE stimulation and then thinking about the sensations that linger after you stop stimulation — and interspersing rounds of KURVE stimulation with rounds of imagined stimulation; simply pay attention to all of your sensations.

The key here is repetition. The more you go back and forth between rounds of actual physical stimulation of your G-spot and rounds of imagined G-spot stimulation, the more you will prime the power of imagination to access these sensations.

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